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Health&Wellness,  Life with N

Things I DON`T Want For The New Year

This is not against anyone who believes in New Years` Resolutions, so please don`t take this that way.

This is a reminder for me to be able to come back to throughout 2020. I am someone who sets resolutions and then forgets about them and feels like a giant failure. I like to set goals, and make stepping stones to achieving my goals, but not HUGE goals.

Huge goals to me feel overwhelming and impossible. So it was several years ago that I stopped setting Resolutions.

I was inspired by my lovely sister, whom you can go follow over here to write about the things that I don`t want in 2020. I was so surprised and shocked, I didn`t even know what she meant to be honest.

Being always so focused on not being good enough, not being thin enough, not being enough ever, resolutions to me mean things that I can change and make myself better. But, what if I am already better? What if the ME that I am right now, really doesn`t need to be so focused on being anything other than what I am already?

We learn at a young age to want to be something different than what we already are. We learn to not love ourselves, and not appreciate what we have, and to always be wanting/needing more.

But, we don`t learn that we are beautiful beings the way we are, and that we are beautiful while changing absolutely NOTHING. We don`t learn that self-love, self-care, and self-talk are all HUGE and very important things.

And, we don`t learn that treating ourselves with the same kindness we give to others is crucial. From the time we are little, it is somewhat normal to treat ourselves with such unkindness. Why? Why did this happen? Why does it continue to happen?

So, as I bid farewell to 2019, I am bidding farewell to other things as well.

In 2020 I am determined to fall back in love with me. I am pretty awesome, and I am going to take that time to see it. I am saying good-bye to all the negative self-talk and hatred that I have for myself.

I`m letting go of the thought that I can`t be a successful blogger. Because, first, who defines success, and second, why can`t I?

I am going to leave behind justifying my food choices, and punishing myself for making them. I am going to leave behind treating myself with harshness.

2019 can keep the chaos and confusion that I often felt in my mind. I am determined to take care of my mental health, and to notice when things are not feeling good for me and to DO SOMETHING about it.

I`m welcoming positivity and good vibes in 2020. I know that not every day is going to be easy, and some days might be really, really hard, but I also know that I am worth that work. I am worth doing this for myself.

2019 can keep the notion of self-care being selfish, because 2020 won`t be hearing that at all. Self-care is NECESSARY and CRUCIAL. I am a mama of 3, and I need to care for me too. (You need to care for you too regardless if you are a mama or not.)

2019 can keep the negativity and the fear of failure, because I am no longer afraid.

2020 is bringing bravery and courage, because I know I have that too.

I know that I am a strong, brave, courageous woman. I got this.

Look out 2020.

Love Always, N

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10 Comments

  • Sarah Mark

    I absolutely LOVE this post!! I would normally set New Years resolutions but I feel I’m just setting myself up to fail next year I will definitely be doing this!
    Success is measured by what you find successful! Of course you can be a successful blogger in 2020.

  • Lia

    I love this. I’ve been saying this. Who defines success? Exactly! If we let that get to our heads we will never be determined to achieve anything! Wonderful post. Happy New year! I have a reflective post up on my blog about the new year too. If you could check it out, that would be great! ✨✨

  • Teresa

    LOVE THIS! You go girl! That’s the attitude that will help you take over the world 😉 Particularly because you’re absolutely right: who says what ‘success’ actually is? We all measure it differently, according to what we each value the most in life. It’s your life, your blog and your success, don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. Happy 2020!

  • Julie

    Yes! Self-acceptance and self-love is so important! I’ve made it my top resolution this year too, though I know it’ll time to really achieve it. Like you said, we’ve been taught to keep “becoming better”. The thought pattern has been established and it will take time for me to undo it.
    I hope you’ll keep practicing self-love especially because you have 3 kids! What’s better than a mom who shows them by example that they’re wonderful the way they are? That we should love ourselves the way we are? I can’t think of anything.

    Thanks for this lovely and inspiring post! Happy new year to you. 🙂

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