Do you ever hear that voice in your head that is constantly knocking you down?

That one that tries to convince you that you can`t do anything right. That wicked one that taunts and hackles you.

That voice that convinces you you are worthless.

That you will never be good enough. It convinces you that you have failed on every account, and really, there is no sense in you trying anymore.

I definitely hear that voice. All the time. Actually, every minute of every day and it is always telling me to not even bother trying anymore, because I will simply fail.

It tells me that success is not even possible. And by success, I just mean simplicity. To live simply, fully, and happily. That is just not something I can do.

Do you have the inner meanie as I call it? That one voice in your head that you wish would simply stop. You would do anything if it meant that it would be quiet.

My inner meanie is always there. It is always pulling me back from the step forward I can occasionally take. The step forward that I can find strength to take from here to there.

Two steps forward, then spiral back down

Your Inner Meanie is that voice inside of you that questions everything about you and makes you feel inadequate. It may not always be there. Perhaps it may not always be loud. Your inner meanie may whisper so softly that it leaves you wondering if it was there in the first place. It can leave you questioning. It can leave you questioning your entire being.

Your inner meanie knows you from every angle and knows all your weaknesses and strengths. It can take every part of you and turn it on you, making you an enemy of yourself.

I think the goal of the inner meanie is to do just that, to turn you against you, and eventually it can end up destroying you.

Reaching a road block.

I`m sure it`s there with the intent to protect.

With the intent to make sure we make good choices. With the intent to keep us safe. Regardless of it`s intent, because of how it works, it tends to hurt us in the process of it all.

On the map from point A to point B, you inner meanie makes you take 100 detours and circle around many times before it allows you to arrive. Upon arriving, you are now filled with dread, anxiety and desperation.

It is a vicious unfair cycle.

So what can we do?

I think taking the time to listen to that voice is helpful, and to really hear what it is saying, and making the effort to understand the `why`. Also, take a few moments and try to appreciate that that voice is only trying to keep you safe. Although it often may be more annoying than helpful, it is just a version of you trying to help you navigate.

At times, it is likely helping you navigate in a completely wrong direction, and I think that`s when self-talk can be so helpful. If you can re-direct it, and help it understand the `why` then in time, you can train the inner meanie to only talk when it is actually needed.

Can you relate to any of this? Share your experience below!

Love Always, N

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31 thoughts on “Inner Meanie

  1. That nasty inner voice – yes I think we all have one. I’ve recently done some NLP work to reprogram my thoughts and honestly it helps most days to stay positive and start changing my mindset. Hugs.

  2. Excellent post. I constantly try to ignore the inner meanie but, as you say, it just shouts louder! I need to start taking your advice on board and addressing what it’s saying rather than completely ignoring it.

  3. You are so right. Ignoring the inner meanie will only make it scream louder! Listening then addressing the message will quiet it down! ❤️ Great post!

  4. Wow did I have scroll to get my comment in! Be proud of yourself for that alone girl! This was a fantastic post. Your imagery was extremely vivid. I also love your photographs. Something I need to work on for my blog. This will be speaking to people for a long time.

  5. Everyone had an inner meanie I will said, The mind is such a dynamic and powerful place. All we can do is strive to overcome our personal obstacles and learn to control that little voices. Thanks for sharing.

  6. Its like you were narrating my life. Especially these last few days. I feel like I’m stuck. Like I try finding a different job but cant get past the interviews. I try to make everyone in my life happy but it doesnt work. I always mess up somewhere. And I just feel like i havent accomplished much in my years after high school. It’s sad. Im trying though. Trying to not be so sad

  7. I think we all sometimes hear that voice in our minds. It’s okay though, once we learn to separate it and just move on to better thoughts I think we’ll be just fine. It’s all about what we are feeding our minds?

  8. This is relateable for sure. I have felt a voice of doubt and despair whispering in my head at times even when it seems like everything is going right. The mind is such a dynamic place. All we can do is strive to overcome our personal obstacles little by little. Thanks for sharing.

  9. I can relate. When my inner meanie is in attack mode, I try to drown it with positivity. I focus on all the amazing things in my life, build mantras that I keep repeat in my head and do a little bit of self care.

  10. This was a very emotional read! I’ve struggled with an inner meanie for some time. It usually happens when I get stressed out or overwhelmed with school. Redirecting inner negativity by explaining the why is a brilliant strategy. I’ll definently try this out sometime! Thanks for sharing this insightful post 🙂

  11. Most times I try to ignore my inner-meanie. I never thought it could actually be trying to protect me from an unfavorable situation. I do agree that self-talk is vital!

  12. Inner meanie is a great term to use, it almost pokes fun at it, to take the power out of it and l love that.

    I’ve always had an inner meanie, I tried to make it go away but it won’t at least not completely. Instead, lve developed an inner champion, who shouts way louder than my inner meanie does, which is progress!

    Thanks for sharing!

  13. Everything You said is so true and inspiring? so many people put up with and inner meanie and don’t even realize it !

  14. I’ve been struggling with my inner meanie all my life. Few people can be as mean as her, but at the end of the day, I think she’s just scared and worried about failure.

    Like you said, it’s good to listen to it and understand why. I’m still trying to figure out how to redirect and train her to support me rather than run me down.

    Thanks for the post!

  15. Inner voices can be so destructive. I have been told I am my own worse enemy and I am my harshest critic. All true. Mindfulness, meditation and medication all help. Thank you for sharing your story x

  16. I for sure have an inner meanie! I usually attribute to my anxiety, but I feel like my negative self talk usually works hand in hand with my anxiety. It’s something I’m trying to work on in therapy, but it’s so hard to turn the negative into a positive! But if I can be kind to others, why can’t I be kind to myself???

    Great post!

    Emily |

  17. Nice post! I thought the section on the “inner meanie” being there to protect us in some way was interesting. It made me start to think about how it might be doing this. My initial thought is that it might be trying to protect us from failure by trying to convince us that we are worthless, not good enough, etc.

    I realized several years ago that just being aware of my inner self-critic was enough to soften it; as I became aware of how devastatingly brutal he could be. I was astonished at some of the things I was telling myself and realized that no one would say those same sorts of things to me.


    1. Thanks for reading!! Being aware of our inner self-critic is great. When we hear how we are speaking to ourselves, I think we tend to soften. We deserve a lot better from ourselves! Sending love your way friend!

  18. I have an incredibly chatty Inner Meanie – and lately they’ve been really vocal about what I do or do not deserve to have in my life – so I relate to this so much right now!

  19. My inner meanie has ruined all of my positive thinking. It gives me more bad days and only goes away when I listen to it. I try to accept the thoughts as being there and letting them go away but they can get louder. Reading positive quotes definitely helps remind me to think positive again.

  20. I think that all our inner voices have a function and developed from a survival feature as a child. My inner meanie may be harsh because it is repeating what it heard from adults “why can’t you catch a ball, everyone else can catch the ball”, etc etc. The voice needs to be soothed and allowed to heal – when I become cross with it or critical of my inner critic then it only continues to feed the cycle. When I take the time to say “I’m so sorry that you were told that. You are good enough, it’s okay that you can’t catch a ball” then it slowly helps me to heal that internalised toxicity.

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